Life answers

… to all of your life’s questions through the unbridled power of quantum prediction and impact ionised divination, using our unique on-line life decision assistant (deluxe version).

A Life Lilly.

Seeker, your question…

In order to maximise the benefit of Noetic wisdom available to you, only think out your question once. And only after having coalesced your thoughts around a singular nexus of uncertainty. So think hard. Now seek your answer, beget wisdom and heal your ailing љin-aura:-

Click here for your answer...


Life grass.

If you believe in small things that you can’t see, you might believe in quantum mechanics. The good folks at the Global Consciousness Project do. Specifically:-

“Everything is interconnected. By embodying an awareness of this interconnection, we can tap into information and energy not limited by space and time, and profoundly amplify transformation, innovation, and well-being.”

And so the Zener diode within the Zenerglass is connected to you too. It’s internal quantum movements and impact ionisations resonate in harmony with the neurons in your brain and your (currently) incomplete љin-aura. Noetic sciences teach us that due to Riemann causality, the Zenerglass sees the All of you. If asked, it can answer deep philosophical and personal questions such as:-

  • Should I have that experimental cosmetic surgery?
  • Can cats, dogs and rabbits coexist in a bedsit?
  • Is now the time to join the Navy?
  • Is it okay to dump my husband via Instagram?
  • Will my life ever amount to anything?

And other such questions we all seek answers to. The unique selling points of the Zenerglass are:-

  • It is driven by 100% completely understood quantum mechanics.
  • It’s answers are forthright and credible.
  • No weird black balls are necessary. Ball, shmall.

Technicalities and behind the scenes

The interesting stuff. There are similar(ish) on-line decision sites all around , but they generally implement the decision making process as something akin to this code:-

 eight.innerText = "";
 var num = Math.floor(Math.random() * Math.floor(answers.length));
 answer.innerText = answers[num];

Unfortunately, the majority of browser JavaScript engines (V8 JavaScript) implement Math.random() as a simple xorshift128+ pseudorandom number generator with an internal 128 bit state, and a nominal period of $2^{128} - 1$. It’s also not cryptographically secure, so just by observing a few outputs (decisions) you can fully determine the internal state and thus predict all future decisions. That’s not the way to heal a sickly љin-aura.

// Static and exposed for external use.
static inline void XorShift128(uint64_t* state0, uint64_t* state1) {
  uint64_t s1 = *state0;
  uint64_t s0 = *state1;
  *state0 = s0;
  s1 ^= s1 << 23;
  s1 ^= s1 >> 17;
  s1 ^= s0;
  s1 ^= s0 >> 26;
  *state1 = s1;

REALLYREALLYRANDOM does it like this, which is as the name suggests, really really random:-

MessageDigest md = MessageDigest.getInstance(HASH_TYPE);
String answer = "ran out of entropy";

do {
    byte[] entropy = zenerglass.getAsNativeData();   <====
    byte[] bytes = md.digest(entropy);

    // Rejection sample to get a fair choice.
    for (byte b : bytes) {
        int index = Byte.toUnsignedInt(b);
        if (index <= (Choices.length - 1)) {
            answer = Choices[index];
} while (answer.equals("ran out of entropy"));

Notice zenerglass.getAsNativeData();. Fresh, raw and completely unpredictable entropy is pulled from the Zenerglass and it’s Zener diode. It is then hashed and a decision made in the Seeker’s best interests. 20 (potential answers) is not an integer divisor of 256, so we also use rejection sampling to ensure absolutely uniformly distributed choice with no bias whatsoever. With a 512 bit block width hash function, there is a 0.55% probability $ \big( \frac{256 - 20}{256} \big) ^{64} $ that one batch of entropy will be insufficient, given the wastefulness of rejection sampling. In those rare cases (String answer = "ran out of entropy"), we fetch another batch.

This is why ours is the bestest Oracle.

A Life cactus.


None needed. We wholly guarantee 100% the quality of the answer selection process. The Zenerglass is all seeing and all knowing